Things Athena truly, deeply believes:
- Jill has the power to summon fun creepy-crawleys. Sometimes, when Jill is so inclined, she will call my name and a bug will manifest at her fingertip.
- Sometimes I eat these bugs.
- Sometimes the bugs will escape and crawl over my lip.
- Sometimes I need help when this happens.
- Jill has the power of Sheba.
- The food in the yellow packets is WAY better than the shitty stuff I used to get.
- Somehow, Jill has barred my entrance to the Forbidden Cupboard of Mystery.
- Jill still has not figured out where I’ve stashed my paper straws. Ergo, I can bring her straws to play with.
- When I am sad about the world/because I can’t reach a bug on a wall/am slightly malcontent, I need only cry for Jill to pick me up and make it all better.
- Cold mornings mean cuddles beneath the duvet.
- Warm mornings mean sleeping in the sunbeams on the windowsill.
- If I am bored, I can get a toy from my toybox. Jill will want to play with this toy.
- Jill knows when I want to scratch the carpet
- And the mattress
- And the curtains
- She is magic
- Jill also controls the Hidden Cupboard of Secrets
- And the Fridge of Wonderful Smells
Things I truly, deeply believe:
This kitten is spoiled beyond belief.
